Hey kids! The next that you get all pouty about “the corporations” coopting your “scene”, as if yours is the first subculture to have experienced such a usurpation; remember the Beats.

Hey kids! The next that you get all pouty about “the corporations” coopting your “scene”, as if yours is the first subculture to have experienced such a usurpation; remember the Beats.

fuckyeahshortguys:

Johnny Galecki- 5’5”

This image is absolutely tragic. A short celebrity, obviously dressed by a stylist (albeit an absolutely clueless one), wearing a sample suit that is much too large for him, thus making him look much shorter. Either that, or the Big Bang Theory isn’t paying this guy and he was reducing to buying a terrible off-the-rack suit from Men’s Warehouse. However, Galecki is not alone, as most short men don’t know how a suit is supposed to fit and often end up wearing “regular” sized suits that are much too large for them.
With his arms at this position, the sleeve hems should end at the wrist bone. There’s about two, maybe even two and a half, inches of excess fabric there. He would appear much taller if the length was correct. If you’re a short guy, above all else, you want to make certain that your sleeve length is correct. Otherwise you’ll look like a kid wearing a suit that he’s supposed to “grow into.”
While the length of the jacket itself is about right, the width of the shoulders is much too large. Notice the sharp angle at the shoulders. This is caused by the shoulder pads extending beyond the end of his shoulder. This can usually be solved by removing the pads, but ideally you want to pads to end where your shoulders end.
The shoulders are the first tell-tale sign that he’s wearing a designer’s sample intended for a much taller and rakish model. The second is the fact that he had the jacket completely unbuttoned, because he appears to have a bit of a gut going on. 
The next tell-tale sign that working on the Big Bang Theory doesn’t pay is that it appears Galecki ran to the premiere after getting off of his day job as a painter, because he still has a hideous pair of boots on and neglected to tuck in his shirt. 
While it might be a consequence of his ugly-ass boots, the “break” in his pants is actually a mound of gathered fabric. The break refers to the point where the pant legs and your shoes meet, which should leave nothing more than a “wrinkle” at this angle. While it’s entirely possible that his pants are hammed correctly for actual shoes, it’s also possible that he’s wearing pants that are just too long. Either way, the gathering points to the latter, which makes him look even shorter his 5’ 5”. 
Short cut suits are very difficult to find at any price point. And often when you do find them, they’re cut for overweight men. While made-to-measure suits are coming down in price every few months thanks to increased competition, advances in manufacturing technology and cheap labour in China, odds are that unless you have the money for a Ralph Lauren Black Label suit (the best off-the-rack short cuts, hands down) you’re going to need to find a close regular fit off-the-rack and then take it to a tailor to make the necessary alterations.
Regular cuts are made for men 5’ 9” to 6’ 3”, however if you’re just shy of average height some regular cuts might fit your body very well. I’m 5’ 7” and 36R jackets from H&M, Mexx, Banana Republic & Ralph Lauren Black Label fit me better than short cuts from Hugo Boss, Brooks Brothers, Calvin Klein and just about every short cut at chain suit stores.  

fuckyeahshortguys:

Johnny Galecki- 5’5”

This image is absolutely tragic. A short celebrity, obviously dressed by a stylist (albeit an absolutely clueless one), wearing a sample suit that is much too large for him, thus making him look much shorter. Either that, or the Big Bang Theory isn’t paying this guy and he was reducing to buying a terrible off-the-rack suit from Men’s Warehouse. However, Galecki is not alone, as most short men don’t know how a suit is supposed to fit and often end up wearing “regular” sized suits that are much too large for them.

With his arms at this position, the sleeve hems should end at the wrist bone. There’s about two, maybe even two and a half, inches of excess fabric there. He would appear much taller if the length was correct. If you’re a short guy, above all else, you want to make certain that your sleeve length is correct. Otherwise you’ll look like a kid wearing a suit that he’s supposed to “grow into.”

While the length of the jacket itself is about right, the width of the shoulders is much too large. Notice the sharp angle at the shoulders. This is caused by the shoulder pads extending beyond the end of his shoulder. This can usually be solved by removing the pads, but ideally you want to pads to end where your shoulders end.

The shoulders are the first tell-tale sign that he’s wearing a designer’s sample intended for a much taller and rakish model. The second is the fact that he had the jacket completely unbuttoned, because he appears to have a bit of a gut going on. 

The next tell-tale sign that working on the Big Bang Theory doesn’t pay is that it appears Galecki ran to the premiere after getting off of his day job as a painter, because he still has a hideous pair of boots on and neglected to tuck in his shirt. 

While it might be a consequence of his ugly-ass boots, the “break” in his pants is actually a mound of gathered fabric. The break refers to the point where the pant legs and your shoes meet, which should leave nothing more than a “wrinkle” at this angle. While it’s entirely possible that his pants are hammed correctly for actual shoes, it’s also possible that he’s wearing pants that are just too long. Either way, the gathering points to the latter, which makes him look even shorter his 5’ 5”. 

Short cut suits are very difficult to find at any price point. And often when you do find them, they’re cut for overweight men. While made-to-measure suits are coming down in price every few months thanks to increased competition, advances in manufacturing technology and cheap labour in China, odds are that unless you have the money for a Ralph Lauren Black Label suit (the best off-the-rack short cuts, hands down) you’re going to need to find a close regular fit off-the-rack and then take it to a tailor to make the necessary alterations.

Regular cuts are made for men 5’ 9” to 6’ 3”, however if you’re just shy of average height some regular cuts might fit your body very well. I’m 5’ 7” and 36R jackets from H&M, Mexx, Banana Republic & Ralph Lauren Black Label fit me better than short cuts from Hugo Boss, Brooks Brothers, Calvin Klein and just about every short cut at chain suit stores.  

Despite having a severed foot sent to them by, an alleged, narcissistic sociopath turned sex murdered, the Conservatives were the biggest beneficiaries of the reportage of this grisly act. If there are anymore contentious laws that the government would like to pass, or ministers who would like to admit to malfeasance, early next will be the most opportune time to do so. Here’s a quick overview of big three stories that were effectively buried by this mostly salacious and speculative coverage.

Parliament passes a motion forcing striking CP workers back to work: Back-to-work legislation is quickly becoming the favoured implement in the Conservative attack on workers’ rights, the use of which has again been tarted up as a difficult move needed to buffer a weak economic recovery from turbulence. The government couldn’t have asked for a better story to displace what could have been a nasty row between the Left and the Right that might have prompted some wider debate. Should the government – especially one informed by an activist liberal tendency — be interfering in labour negotiations within the private sector? What other unsavory and possibility unconstitutional acts of government intervention should be undertaken in the name of shoring up the recovery/taking the country out of recession? These are things that won’t be discussed because those pages and that time would have been afforded this story were filled by the Luka Magnotta story.

Thomas Mulcair in Alberta: After going all in on a complex and risky play to assert himself as a learned and capable economic manager, and losing, Mulcair finally visited the tar sands development in Alberta. Even if Mulcair had had a James Cameron-esq apostasy and emerged from the West as a booster for so-called “ethical oil”, aka. “dirty oil,” these reports would have never held a candle to those about a homosexual porn star, kitten torturer, pretty boy. Now the government can continue to lash Mulcair over his divisive stance on the oil sands for months to come, because little coverage was devoted to the junket.

GM Halves Production At It’s Oshawa, Ontario Plant: Speaking of doing something for the good for the economy, remember a few years back when scads of public money was use to bailout this manufacturer of gas-guzzling, clunkers in the name of saving the domestic economy? Yeah, neither do I, but the handshake deal was that a government-unwritten GM wouldn’t cut any jobs. (Wages were another thing altogether.) Last week the CAW announced, well in advance of GM doing so, that one of the last two lines at it’s Oshawa plant would be gradually scaled to zero, ultimately leaving nearly two-thousand people without a job and rendering harm to the economy. Instead of feeling taken, Canadians were wondering what kind of sicko would rape, torture and dismember a human being and what kind of lesser sickos — if only slightly — would actively seek out the, still, publicly accessible video of this crime. While the federal government wasn’t the only level of government involved in the deal, this could have been a black-eye for federal finance minister Jim Flaherty because, in addition to being Mr.Economy, his riding (Whitby-Oshawa) is immediately West of the Oshawa plant and it goes without saying that many in his riding are in some way employed because of the GM plant. The public perception of a finance minister who can’t even look out for the well being of his riding’s economy can be damaging. That is, if people aren’t already transfixed by something more gruesome and upsetting.

Η Γενιά των 592 Ευρώ” (which loosely translates to Generation 592€) is a sociological comedy that examines the lives of underemployed and unemployed twenty-somethings living in Greece under the austerity measures. Generation 592€ is the colloquial term given to educated, twenty-something Greeks who earn only the minimum wage of 592€ a month. It has since been canceled, for lack of an available budget, but it’s nice to see a show that deals with this staggering social problem without resorting to Two Broke Girls stereotyping and nonsense.

Η Γενιά των 592 Ευρώ” (which loosely translates to Generation 592€) is a sociological comedy that examines the lives of underemployed and unemployed twenty-somethings living in Greece under the austerity measures. Generation 592€ is the colloquial term given to educated, twenty-something Greeks who earn only the minimum wage of 592€ a month. It has since been canceled, for lack of an available budget, but it’s nice to see a show that deals with this staggering social problem without resorting to Two Broke Girls stereotyping and nonsense.

I want to briefly riff on how much I hate this commercial for Crest 3D White toothpaste.

This commercial is trying to sell cosmetic toothpaste to women by suggesting that not will using it make them more attractive, its use will consequently attract the attention of attractive men. This is a stock narrative trope that accesses various assumptions about gender and sexuality that I’m sure could fill an entire masters thesis — cite Dworkin, Mulvey and Wolf, friends — and the only thing that changes in its various iterations is the setting in which it takes place. This is where the problem lays.

This scene takes place on a city bus. Firstly, the disciplined social code of using public transit dictates that not only is eye contact between strangers to be avoided at all costs, staring at other passengers is completely unwelcome. Secondly, considering what we know about how women in Western capitalist societies are conditioned to assess men (tip of the hat for slagging grad students above), a man riding the bus, let alone one who stares at strangers, would be dismissed as unfit to date. Sure, he’s attractive, but couldn’t he afford to take a taxi or own a private vehicle? Something is seriously off about this guy. Perhaps the woman would think about getting off at some densely populated stop and hope that he doesn’t follow her off or continue to her destination, desperately hoping that that moment of eye contact wasn’t interpreted as an invitation to come over and pester her.

When creating narratives and deploying tired old tropes, we need to be mindful of just how much audience disbelief can be suspended before we create fantasies. This glaring oversight leads me to suspect that script was conceived by and hastily approved by men, because a team of women would have zeroed in on it right away.

I noticed that you became pretty curt when I entered zero percent into the tip field of the credit card imprinter when it was my turn to pay the cheque, which my company feel quite uncomfortable, so I thought that I would explain why I feel that you didn’t earn a tip.

  1. The few times that you visited our table, you spent most of that time flirting with my friend’s wife than you did paying attention to everyone else. You must be new at this whole hospitality thing, because you’re supposed to turn on the charm with the unattractive women and you’re also supposed to pay attention to people when you’re taking their orders.
  2. One of the pint glasses that you brought to our table hadn’t been washed. It had foam residue on it and smelled like skunky beer. We tried to get your attention each time you passed our table, but you ignored us. Finally one of your colleagues “helped” us, not by bringing out a new glasses but by hastily washing the dirty one. Now, my parents own a restaurant in the same region as the one where you work, so I know for a fact that that glass was supposed to have been submerged in bleach and water for two minutes, then washed with soap and a very hot water before it make it back out into the dining room. Maybe the bar ran out of those branded glasses, but the beer tastes the same no matter what’s printed on the glass.
  3. You almost forgot to take my order. Now, to be honest, the last place I went to completely forgot to take my order, so you’re already one better, but I wasn’t impressed when you grabbed the menu from my hands and started to walk away.
  4. You didn’t ask me how I wanted my burger done. Whenever I try out a new place, unless I’m there for the signature dish, I order the burger. If a restaurant makes a lousy burger, especially one that purports to be a “grill”, it’s a clear indication that the executive chef doesn’t care and that everything else on the menu is terrible. That said, the burger was good, but it would have been even better had it been medium-rare. It also would have helped if the bun wasn’t stale and squashed, and if the tomato slice had been fresh, but it was a busy Saturday night and it all ended up in the same place anyways.

Dude, I get it. It must really suck being over thirty and working as a waiter, especially on a Saturday night. But there’s a certain minimum level of service that you have to provide before a responsible person begins to consider a tip. Even an “insulting” 10% tip would have been nearly $5, which was $5 too much tonight.

Thanks for understanding.